First thing, Bill called home. It was already past two in the morning and he didn’t want to wake his fiancé, but better she knew he wasn’t coming home and better he was the one to tell her. He kept a lie in storage. He always hoped he wouldn’t have to use it.
As luck would have it, when he called there was no answer. This meant she was asleep or in the shower or not at home, or, and this was actually the one from way out in left field, she was home and so angry with him she wasn’t answering the call. But that wasn’t like her, he knew. Even angry, she would answer the phone since there was always the chance he’d been in an accident, or hurt at work, or even arrested. Yes, his being arrested was in her frame of reference. It had happened once and on that fateful day no one could reach him for many, many long hours.
That his fiancé didn’t answer the phone was a relief. Bill knew that put the onus on her as much as on him and this usually meant they both trusted each other’s veracity.
Lorraine said she had to pee and got up. To make things simple, Bill went with her and when they were settled in the bed again, in her girlfriend’s spare bedroom, Lorraine reminded him it was his turn. Bill reached for her. She let him have a brief moment of kissing and fondling before insisting he fess up.
“Because,” he said. “I didn’t mean to and didn’t even plan to. It started the first night when I was a busboy. I spilled soup on a customer and he was horrible to the waitress and so I stood up for her. Turns out she…”
“I know the story,” Lorraine said.
“Well, so there it is.”
“You could have said no.”
“Yup. Just like you could have accepted no. At some point, when you’re twenty years old and it’s just standing there staring you in the face, you say to yourself ‘what the hell’ and you rationalize it by saying it doesn’t mean anything anyway. But it does mean something.”
“Don’t you feel guilty?”
“Don’t you? You’re not exactly contributing to my happy home. You didn’t think about me feeling guilty when you pursued me.”
“Yup,” Lorraine said. “And I should have, shouldn’t I? I mean I got cheated on and it wrecked my life as I knew it.”
“Well, so there you have it. Then, after the first time it’s easy. You kind of get used to tasting different food. And you get a reputation, so to speak. And then there are pressures that come at you, you know, like when you don’t want to but kind of have to cause it’s easier than not or cause someone has something on you. It’s actually all messed up when you think of it that way.”
“Yeah. It really is,” Lorraine said. “ Maybe we should just quit it then.”
“Don’t you like me anymore?”
“Course I do.”
“Don’t you want me anymore?”
“You know I do.”
“Good. So let’s have another go-round before we cut out of here.”
Bill summoned Lorraine. First thing, she lay on him while they kissed and he rubbed her back. They kissed and kissed, all the while his hands working their way down to her buttocks. Then they moved on their sides facing each other so they could equally explore each other’s bodies with their hands and more.
Having had that discussion, Lorraine seemed a bit more needy than usual, a bit more eager not only to please, but to surrender. Bill thought this, but then he thought maybe he was just imagining. Then he was lost in her but not so much so that he didn’t ask her if she was okay.
“I’m fine,” she said. “Just fine.”
Now Available on Amazon
Pick up a copy of all my published works here:
Books by Peter Weiss.
That club was a no-fun club. Lorraine, as she shared it, was afraid to go out with the person she’d met. She was afraid because she was insecure. She was afraid because despite having been with Bill now, she still doubted her female abilities, her sexual abilities and her attractiveness. She was, she said, just plain afraid.
After work they drove to Lorraine’s friend’s house where they met when Lorraine’s kids were home. Laying there fully naked under the covers, she in his arms, she asked, “What club?”
“You know,” he said, “the one where you’re afraid of everything.”
“You afraid of everything?”
“I’m not afraid of you.”
“Well I’m not afraid of you anymore either. But I was, and anyway that’s not what I’m talking about.”
“I know. And I know what you’re talking about.”
”So, are you afraid of everything?”
“Pretty much,” said Bill, “and then some.”
“Give me some examples.”
“What’s this? True confessions?”
“One friend to another. I am your friend cause I’d never hurt you and I’d never betray your trust.”
“Okay, one friend to another then. It started God-knows-how-long ago. And I never thought about it much. Still don’t. But after I got busted and knew I was going to jail, I took to my bed for about six months. I got drunk early in the morning, did drugs and stayed nearly comatose. I was scared out of my mind. They were threatening to not let me graduate. I had to cop the deal just to not get thrown out of school.”
Lorraine sat up. As she did so the covers fell from her and she was exposed to her waist. She moved slightly so she was facing Bill. He sat up, leaned on the pillows against the headboard.
“That’s really f’d up,” she said.
“You think?”
“Uh, duh…,” Lorraine said.
“Oh, good,” Bill said. “I thought it was just me.”
Lorraine smacked him on the arm playfully. “Get out of here,” she said. As she said this, whether from the cold or because Bill was looking at her, her nipples stiffened and she became self-aware. When she began to cover up, Bill stopped her by taking hold of her hands on the covers.
“What?” she asked.
“Stay like that,” he said.
“Why?”
Bill leaned way forward and towards her. He kissed her on her stiffened nipples then reached up, took her chin in his hand and kissed her on the lips. “Because you’re beautiful,” he said.
“You don’t have to say that, you know.”
“Oh, I know. Believe me I do.”
“Good. So before we go any further, and since we’re being brutally honest, why do you mess around on your fiancé? Isn’t she beautiful?”
“I can’t answer that. And she’s very beautiful. Why did you pursue me? If I recall, after we had that talk downstairs in the party room, I told you we were square. You wouldn’t let it be.”
“Okay. Tit for tat. I pursued you for multiple reasons, all personal. I needed the job. I really needed it and still do. I was extremely horny. I hadn’t been with anyone for close to two years. I needed to get laid. I knew you’d do me if I kept insisting and that I probably didn’t have to worry about rejection. So I insisted, even made it so you’d feel bad if you rejected me. And here we are. I even fixed it so we have a place to come to.”
“Well thank goodness for little favors.”
“Don’t be patronizing and don’t be glib.”
“How about wanton and demanding?” Bill reached out for her but Lorraine did her best to avert him.
“Tit for tat,” she said. “Your turn.”
